One day last year I was walking towards the train station to get to school. I was in a hurry because i spent my getting ready time playing guitar hero. I didn’t want to miss the train.My leg was playing up cause it’s just loves to hurt on me because it’s a fag(It could be homosexual with my other leg?) As I was saying,I was limping towards the train station,I was about 200 meters away.In my boredom and loneliness I talk to God(not so much jesus GOD but like just GOD in general.I said to him “man wouldn’t it be funny if a train came right now”To my expected but not really expected surprise a train came.”asshole” was the next thing I said. Piss bolting while limping sort of looks like a 6-year-old pretending to be on a hourse.Every one looking at me saw my extravagant but embarrassing gallop towards the train.I made the train jumped over the fence and did a spin move while entering the doors of the train so I could immediately sit down facing towards the door. Ironic and cool is my style.

 

Anyways I went to uni for my first day,I was so scared,but it wasn’t that bad.I was so happy I knew some one in my class and that she went to my school so I didn’t have to be a loner.Even though the girl just happens to be the only person from my school that I never really conversed with.Throughout the four years we had one distinct conversation where I told her my name was bob.The night before my wacky lame adventure to the unknown world of uni I had my Nightmare. This one was different,we have this gate and we all know what sound it makes when you open it.After living at my house for 4 years you could be in the back yard and hear the gate open.It reminds me of penguins,when the mother one comes back and is all like having a unique call to know who the farther is. Well anyway in my dream the gate opened,I tried to get up but i was paralyzed,but I knew it was a dream,I knew it wasn’t real,so I was less scared.what got me thinking was the timing of the dream.Maybe it means something?

Cool and ironic.

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Hello.I’m probarly never ever going to drink Bundy rum again after my weekend.Saturday night was one epic night just like my four other previous saturdays. Drinking is fun,drinking untill you can’t remember your night and vomiting up everything until your just dry reaching is a whole new story. Saturday night was supposed to be when I stopped drinking for a while and concentrate on my life being a bit more constructive. I doubt I will power to make this little fantasy of quitting drinking come true. Some people find drinking way too much just completely stupid and not fun at all. What is the point of vomiting up,making a fool out of your self and not being able to remember? Well because there is no point there is a point in it? I found vomiting quite fun and what other chances do you get to forget 3 hours or less of your life?I find it simply amazing that your body can go on an auto pilot mode. The following morning I woke up on the ground,NO hangover YAY. I actually felt quite good,however it kinda freaked me out.One moment i was walking then the next i wake up on the ground with a blanket over me and a pillow 2 meters away from my head.I dont know why the pillow was 2 meters away from me too.

Auto pilot,what controls me when i’m in this drunken trance?. What inside me is driving?Pure feeling and emotion? Me drunk as fuck but I can’t remember?I was told I urinated all over some ones car,there was also an incident with a girl LMAO. I would never do stuff like that even if i was past tipsy.So you can cross that last one out. Anyway onto my life. It’s seems to be looking up,I guess it always can if you look at it in a certain angle.I start a new life tomorrow,UNI LIFE.I’m so scared.What happens tomorrow determines pretty much the rest of my life. I have a perfectly good reason to be scared! I know it will work out,things just do in my life.So wish me luck.

The Guilty Shall Suffer

February 9, 2010

I have officially decided that Guilt is lame! I don’t really feel guilty for anything(I try to convince myself) but nevertheless I still feel like I need to just blog about it.I hate it when even some good things that i do,some times i feel guilty from them,STUPID GULIT. I laugh when people use the word “guilt trip” its sounds retarded and fun,but it’s completely opposite, JUST LIKE SEA WORLD.it’s just some thing you have no control over,well you have all the control but you can’t steer it.Like your a big boat and guilt is at the helm steering you,that was a real bad way to explain that,I shall cross it out and think different more accurate way.It’s just like a pet cat.Im going to give you an idea of guilt and its lameness in PLAY form.Every one meet Steave.

Steave: Hi im steave
Kyle: Steave,sells guns to people,he also likes hot tubs,and has three pet dogs,one has no legs and five arms,hey wait im not a character in this play

Steave:um….yeah you are

Kyle: No im more like God here

Steave: it clearly says kyle

Kyle GOD: No it shouldnt even have anything,im more of a narrator!

Steave: make your fucking mind up!

Kyle GOD Narrator: Fuck you steave you’re gay! go have sex with your dogs you bastard of infernal dick sperm

Steave: how mature. You could hurt someones’s feelings with those words.

Kyle GOD Narrator:Okay I don’t need a name thing just have it blank or use italics. I’m just telling this story in play form GOSH! and I’m sorry for saying those mean things to you.

Steave:hey OMG i sell GUNS

yes you do,you also have a friend named Illarc,Say hi Illarc!

Illarc:sup bitches

Steave: yo cup cake

Illarc:you’re looking good today

well anyway Illarc wants a gun,Steave knows Illarc shouldnt have a gun,but Illarc manipulates Steave

Illarc:Hey Steave,i need a gun.Prefelby the one in your pants,I want to make it shoot 😉

Steave:Here have this gun

NO!!!!!!! Steave man! your ment to be all like I shouldnt,and Illarc cut out the bromance/gay jokes

Steave: okay now I get it.

Illarc: fine. Hey Steave my man,i need a gun for my………um….man things that i do

Steave:I shouldnt man

Illarc:oh why not

Steave: God told me not too

No fuck. Damn you,you smart ass.OKAY Illarc gets a gun off steave,Steave knows he shouldnt have gave him a gun.Ben comes into the play

Ben: Hi GUYS

FUCK UP BEN IM TELLING A STORY! anyway Illarc dose not like ben because he is a dick,and interrupts to many people’s storys,Illarc shoots ben

Ben:WHAT?

oh thats it ben

Ben:what are you going to do?

GOD:muhahaha I can do anything you bitch

Ben:oh fuck

Before ben was shot………

Ben:NO NO NO NO!

Ben was raped fucking hard by Steave’s dogs,he started to enjoy it 20 mins in,untill he got fisted up the ass!! then he was set on fire,he almost died,then he got a phone call that all his family where dead. Ben decided to fight some one,he gets Knocked out first punch,then wakes up with Steave’s dogs,and again raped

So who is in the wrong? ben steave or Illarc?

Illarc cause he killed ben?

Or god for getting pissed off?

but the guilty shall suffer,who do you think feels more guilty?

Every one thinks at one stage of their life,what happens after death? If not then your probably a fly or some creature thats not human however have the capability to read.I was thinking,if GOD gave me a button to kill every single human in existance.Do you think anyone would care 2 seconds after a pressed the button? I don’t really belive in heaven and hell BUT if i had a guess,im pretty sure you become a god when you die.Like you just become god,and know ALL the ins and out of GODHOOD.The world becomes your play ground or you could make a whole new play ground or just do what ever! I would make a whole new race of lizard people,and have them fight humans.I would go back and forth in time just to see things.I might even erase my memory of being god and have a perfect life,then made to get shot half way through so I would turn back into god. I might have a life of super powers.I will create a feeling better than what anyone can imagine,also food. I would turn my self into KING KONG and see what the world dose. I would become a samurai go back and take on Hitler! or create a new Hitler or 5 Hitlers and kill them all.I would make harry potter real,just for the lolz.ALSO on my other world I would be in Lord Of The Rings as some cool ninja.I would totally be in star wars as the coolest Jedi out. So many things i would do. I wonder if lizard sex would be better than human sex?

From the video the lizards don’t really look like they are enjoying it however if you come to think of it though,they don’t look like they hated it when you rip of their tails or feed them to a praymantis. They could just have this huge tolerance for everything and just bottle up all  their emotion.

Dreams OMG

February 7, 2010

This year I been having a lot of dreams about kids.More so babies but kid like babies.Ok they look like kids but its a baby,don’t ask why IT WAS A DREAM and we all know how weird dreams are. Wait a second if you where high all the time,would your dreams be normal?BACK TO THE BABIES.This year I might grow a phobia of knocking up a girl,I doubt I would have a fear of sex any time soon though. SO im in a bit of a pickle.This year i might just stay away from slutty girls,but thats just not enough to keep them from staying away from me! DAMN SLUTS! If I had a baby,I would not know what to name it, it’s probably the BIGGEST decision in some life,I just don’t think i have the guts! but if I did it wouldn’t be an average name,it would be some thing cool from dragon ball Z or something,JUST SOMETHING COOL(maybe name them after Mesopotamian deities).So having baby dreams are way better than my night mares which I havent had in a while. Ever since i started sleeping on my stomach its been able to shield me from the horrible twisted anxiety night mares of doom (or HTANMD for short)I have only one anxiety attack in my life thanks to no-doze tablets and energy drinks. It’s a long story,but i woke up home alone thinking my house was actually trying to kill me,It was a mission to walk in my bedroom to get the home phone I left in there.I finally got it and ran outside of my house just to call some one to come pick me up from my house. I can’t really explain how it felt besides pure fear in a feeling that dose not end,ITS JUST THAT FEELING! it doesnt have a reason to be there its just there, you just have it.

Well in my nightmare its starts of exactly where I went to sleep,which can draw you to a conclusion,was it a dream at all?im laying there then suddenly a massive dark feeling comes over me.The feeling of someone’s presents but an evil some one. I look around only with my eyes I see darkness .A figure shaped human but it’s too dark to make out.I try to move my body,but im paralyzed,nothing will budge.I look and its coming closer and closer towards me. The feeling becomes stronger,I can see it but also feel this dark figure.I don’t know if its intentions are bad,i just know I cant escape. The closer it gets to me the more I try to move,the more strain the more i want to run,all i know is that i don’t want to be here.NO matter how much i try i can’t move.I look up and its there. A hand like object reaches out to me, I’m still not able to move.I dont wake up straight away like you see in those movies when people have night mares.I just blank out.Wake up the next morning,thinking was it real?

If Humans didnt have to die

February 5, 2010

Yes,what would it be like if humans didn’t have to die of old age?Well in this  blog I’m going to detail a world beyond imagination,a world with less death.Assuming that other courses of death is still relevant in this age,such as lead poising and stab wounds AIDS ect. The time line of life would be normal,until you hit 35 you stay the same HOWEVER the older you get the longer and faster your beard grows and for women,they start to get elbow hair pissing out of their arms at a slow but gentile pace,like the hour hand on a clock moving.So the world is over populated and mass killings happen regularly. Life is taken for granted and people celebrate deaths and get all depressed at birthdays.The world is set in generations not countries.There is always some dick head generation that wants to take over the world! .the 8432nd generation consume blood to stay alive and can’t stay in sunlight or else they would die a happy death unlike generation 8439 who could stay alive in the sunlight however turned to diamonds,Generation 8439 where erased from the face of the earth 27 days after they started,due to the “LEARN WHAT A REAL VAMPIRE IS TWLIGHT WHORE LAW” Established in september 23 1492.

Every one would know the truth about religion and what really happened to Jesus! half of the united generations of america is crips and the other half bloods. Australia really has no clue whats going on.France, every one is fat.In Africa no one is starving cause no one lives there or do they!?(it’s also know as mysterious island) No one watches movies or plays on the computer or has a Facebook status. Every one walks around aimlessly,until they have no reason to live,then they start to walk around with flowers. 150 is the average age to commit suicide,rich people would stay rich and the poor will stay poor. you have all your life to find a good job some where. No one actually likes anyone and sex is only interesting until you make a baby then you’re fucked. Everything is uber chilled, no one worries as much,unless there is some sort of unreal fantasy vampire thing going on. Patience is pretty much key to everything,waiting and being bored are just every day things. So that’s pretty much the sorta life we would have if we didn’t have to die if we didn’t have to die.